Light in the Darkness: Holding Onto Hope During the Holidays
December can be a beautiful season—but for many who are grieving, it can also feel heavy, tender, and overwhelming.
During our recent grief talk, Light in the Darkness: Holding Onto Hope in Grief, we gathered in the quiet of a winter morning to acknowledge a truth that often goes unspoken: even mornings can begin in darkness when we are grieving.
We began the talk with dimmed lights and candle flames—each candle lit in honor of someone deeply missed. Names were spoken out loud or quietly held in hearts. In that shared moment, the room slowly changed. The darkness didn’t disappear, but it softened. And together, we were reminded that grief does not mean we are without hope—it means love is still present.
Why Grief Feels Heavier During the Holidays
The holiday season often intensifies grief for many reasons:
- Shorter days and less sunlight affect energy and mood
- Traditions highlight what has changed
- Family gatherings can stir complicated emotions
- Expectations to feel “merry” don’t always match what’s happening inside
If you’ve felt more emotional, more tired, or more irritable this season—you’re not imagining it. Your body and heart are responding honestly.
Hope Isn’t Bright—It’s Gentle
One of the central themes of the talk was redefining hope.
Hope in grief isn’t about forcing positivity or pretending things are okay. Instead, it often looks like:
- Lowering expectations
- Giving yourself permission to do things differently
- Allowing joy and sadness to coexist
- Choosing gentleness over productivity
Hope can be quiet. It can be small. And it can still be enough.
Planning Can Be an Act of Self-Compassion
One of the most practical pieces we discussed was the importance of planning ahead for the holidays—not to control emotions, but to care for ourselves well.
Grief can make decision-making harder. That’s why having a simple, compassionate plan can reduce anxiety and help you feel more grounded as the season unfolds.
To support you, I’m offering a free Holiday Planning Worksheet that walks you through:
- Identifying what feels hardest this season
- Deciding which traditions to keep, change, or release
- Setting gentle boundaries
- Planning for emotional triggers
- Naming supports and coping tools
This worksheet isn’t about “doing the holidays right.”
It’s about honoring where you are.
✨ Download the Free Holiday Planning Worksheet
You can download the worksheet here:
(Print it, journal about it, or revisit it as often as you need.)
You Are Not Alone
If this season feels heavy, please know you don’t have to carry it by yourself. Grief deserves space, compassion, and support. Whether through community, counseling, faith, or safe relationships—healing happens in connection.
As we move through the holidays, may you notice even the smallest light:
a quiet moment,
a memory,
a deep breath,
or the permission to rest.
The light is still there—even when it feels dim.
With hope,
Jessica Frasier, LPC
Hope Again Counseling
Where the light at the end of the tunnel gets brighter each day.
